The Dillard Doctrine

Urban Conservative Commentary on Politics & Life

A Clinical History of Palin Derangement Syndrome

Palin Derangement Syndrome (PDS) (also known as Palin False Outrage) is a newly emerging paranoid personality disorder that is becoming epidemic across the United States since the nomination of Gov. Sarah Palin as the Republican vice presidential candidate. Similar to Bush Derangement Syndrome (BDS), it has shown to be endemic to those suffering from any virus associated with the Liberalvirade or Progressivirade families.

Clinical Onset: People suffering from PDS generally are marked by the following:

1. A foul odor, usually originating in the armpit, groin, or mouth (note: the oral odor is generally associated with words being spoken by a person with PDS),

2. Bloodshot eyes; usually as a result of extreme alcohol consumption or drug ingestion,

3. Long, unkempt hair or goatee (mostly in men, but can be seen in women as well)

Symptoms: Symptoms of PDS include:

1. A rush to publicize information about Sarah Palin, and to continue to push the information as truth even when proven false,

2. A clearly visible media bias against the Palins, as demonstrated below:

3. A  dementia leading one to state that Ms. Palin is nothing more than a small town mayor. This dementia is usually exacerbated by alcohol/drug consumption, but PDS suffers have shown a spontaneous onset as well.

Treatment: While a rapid infusion of facts has shown to be successful in managing PDS, the only known treatment for the disease seems to be the election of Barack Obama as President. This is an experimental cure that has not been tested or proven in any environment, and should only be used with the utmost caution.




Written by Coby Dillard

September 3, 2008 at 11:52 am

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