The Dillard Doctrine

Urban Conservative Commentary on Politics & Life

Personal Responsibility, Unlearned

I’m not supposed to write from a place of emotion, but this pisses me off:

The saga of a homeless mother and her 12 children continued today, as child welfare workers say they hope to have the family moved into a six-bedroom Sulphur Springs home by the end of the week.

Adams’ plight emerged last week when she and her children were forced to stay in a rundown hotel room after she had been evicted from her apartment. She doesn’t work, and the father of many of her children was in prison.

She said that the county and state were not doing enough to help her and her children. Her statements caused a stir of criticism, mostly from people who said she was the cause of her own problems.

Well, add me to that list of people who feels that this is completely her own fault.

Somewhere between, say, kid #3 and kid #5, a light should’ve come on…”hey, how am I going to take care of these kids? Do I make enough to support them? Is the father going to be around? Will we have a place to live?” And if the answer to any of those questions was no, the solution was simple…stop having kids. You keep having kids after that, and you’re pretty much endangering their welfare. That’s a crime in most states.

I won’t knock the father that’s in prison, only to say that I hope he has a job there and that every cent that doesn’t go to his punishment goes to these kids. But apparently there’s another man (or at least one other one) in the picture. Where the hell is he? Why isn’t he being made to take responsibility for the kids that are his?

Since Ms. Adams feels the county and state aren’t doing enough for her, here’s my suggestion: take the kids. Yes, you read that correctly. Take them all from her, and put them into foster care. If she gets her life together and can show she has a way to provide for them, she can go through the legal processes to get them back (assuming they’d want to go back to her). And if-God forbid-any more kids pop up, take them too. I’m not a fan of state-sponsored sterilizations of women, but I might be convinced to make an exception here.

Sometimes, the best teacher of personal responsibility is painful. And I can’t think of a better way to teach it than having your family removed.

Update: A friend of mine on Facebook sent me this article, which contains this quote from Ms. Adams:

“I can have as many as I want to,” she said. All her kids, she added, “are gifts from God.”

That settles it. Sterilize her…and send her the bill for the procedure.

HB2DF, Coby


Written by Coby Dillard

April 29, 2010 at 12:57 pm

Posted in Rants

Tagged with ,

4 Responses

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  1. My mother and father and grandparents taught all us kids early on that we alone are responsible for our actions. They also told us that they would be there to help if necessary, but that we still faced the consequences if there were any. We were to carry ourselves in a responsible manner and pursue those means that would make us self-sufficient. They preached to us that “The lord helped thosde that helped themselves.”
    I think the government would have been better served if they had shown her after child #3 how to break the cycle and become self-sufficient rather than just hand her money and pay her bills.


    April 29, 2010 at 2:27 pm

  2. Yeah, so…why has it not occured to child services to take these kids away from her????
    the woman is obviously unstable, and incapable of taking responsibility for her actions. whos taxes are paying for her house? wtf?


    April 29, 2010 at 5:54 pm

  3. Exactly, Rafiya. This is where Child services would have been more effective. It is just another glaring spot of the beauracracy that is broken.


    April 29, 2010 at 6:40 pm

  4. Perhaps the words of one of the wisest people I know can shed some light on this, with respect to a related issue. Reprinted without permission (but she would probably approve). Kitty Calavita (“Invitation to Law and Society”):

    “Consider the case of “Octomom.” As this book goes to press, Nadya Suleman, the woman who gave birth to octuplets on January 26, 2009, is being skewered in the court of public opinion. Fifty discussion groups formed on in one week alone, with headers like “What Nadya Suleman Did Was Totally Wrong.” Suleman’s former publicist, who quit after receiving death threats, is quoted on one site, “In terms of reaction to her, I would say not in my experience have I ever seen anything like it. And I would add that I was involved in public relations for Three Mile Island after the [1979 nuclear power plant reactor meltdown].”

    It should be said that the response to this octuplet phenomenon changed dramatically over the course of the first few days. When the births were initially reported, people were fascinated with the rare event and Suleman was “The Miracle Mom.” But, once it was known that she had six other small children, was single, unemployed, and received food stamps, the miracle woman quickly became a mercenary out to rob already-strapped taxpayers. One of the most watched You-Tube videos features the “Octo-Mom Song,” where a popular parody singer plays Suleman giving birth, with a doctor wearing a baseball glove catching babies as they fly out, and the sounds of a cash register in the background. People might be divided about why they are so angry with Suleman, and not everyone is equally obsessed with her single-mom, welfare status. But, one thing is sure. Even in this otherwise fragmented, diverse society where a Durkheimian consensus seems elusive, the compelling Octomom episode has galvanized us in agreement that “What Nadya Suleman Did Was Totally Wrong.” As Durkheim would have predicted (although he might have been surprised by the passion and intensity), our organic society is still capable of moral union. Also predictably, calls have gone out to impose legal sanctions on Suleman’s fertility doctor and to establish a regulatory regime to prevent the birth of any more “Frankin-babies,” as one faith-based show mercilessly called the octuplets.

    This kind of collective outrage is relatively rare, and arguably is associated more often with attacks on individuals—like Suleman—than with a real moral consensus over underlying values.”

    Or maybe not. But, please, return to your regularly scheduled ad hominems.


    April 30, 2010 at 1:43 am

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